STOP 4 | Portugal: The beginning of a shamanic retreat (Days 1-2)

This post is dedicated to DaniCo, who brought me here mentally and spiritually.

Day  1 | July 23^rd

Reached Faro airport with 10 mins delay but thankfully luggage delivery went really smooth: indeed the airport is pretty cozy but well organized, apparently.

The driver was at the Arrival exit, waiting for me, but obviously I didn’t see him, so I had to call the owner. I didn’t take any food, despite I had spent time on the last flight to review all the logistics, and food was not scheduled tonight at the retreat center. Eventually it was not such a bad decision – you will understand this later.

 

We reached the center slightly before 6pm and Geraldine – the shaman – assigned each of us a room or a cabin. I was assigned to a cabin but accepted the suggestion to switch to a room with air-conditioning: it’s already my first time with master plants, I don’t want to push myself too hard.

This was the cabin instead.

We then spent time just wandering around or chilling out at the Monte Mariposa center, while Geraldine was conducting individual interviews with all of us.

The interview focused on what were our Intentions with the plants, what we wanted to accomplish with this treatment, and our answers would help Geraldine to finalize the list of plants (primary and secondary) to five us beyond La Madre, i.e. ayahuasca. She was pretty sure with my plants: she also mentioned them during the interview but I didn’t catch the names, and my interview was pretty short and straight-forward. I also asked any advice for first timers, but she just responded to follow the treatment and let the plants do their job.

 

We still had time to talk with each other and to use the internet on the first night. After all the interviews were completed – we were 16 people and some interviews were pretty long – we were ready to start our Tobacco ceremony.

 

This was the first plant to intake, in the form of juice plus an addition of oregano. We all entered a big ceremony hall, with two big bowls of water at the center and all the 16 of us sitting on a footstool on 3 out of the 4 sides of the room, and Geraldine sitting alone on a chair on the 4^th side.

PIC of HALL

I’ve always imagined a shaman someone like: a) a man, b) from Peru, c) with dark/Inca skin, d) wearing dark colored dresses.

 

 

Geraldine instead was completely different.

 

 

She called us at her table one by one to fill up our mug with the sacred juice; she advised us to drink in one shot and then – at her greenlight – to fill up by ourselves 2 big jars of water from the bowls in the middle (one after the other was completed) and drink. This would have helped and favored/enabled the purge.

Indeed we were preparing the house (our body) for the following days, thus we need to cleanse it as much as possible. Some people started purging immediately after the tobacco, some other after the water. I did not. I felt I took on a lot of liquids and I really felt filled in my body, but nothing was happening, despite I believe all the 15 people around me were purging intensively…and I was just looking at my bucket in front of me.

The ceremony kept going with Geraldine singing shamanic chants – which were amazing by the way – and blowing mapacho or perfume above us one by one. I had started to feel the “Chosen One”, since the only effect I was having was warmth (I was close to the open door, thankfully); but I had signed up for this, I really wanted to experience this “treatment”, to heal with it, or at least to feel better, following the path embarked on the last year.

And it happened! I was able to purge as well, hugging firmly my bucket between my legs. It was liberating. I felt happier and started smiling, slightly beating my feet on the floor, at the sound of the shamanic chants. Little breeze was entering from the door behind me; sometimes I played with the curtains to make sure I got enough fresh air. It was about 11pm, little less than 20°C (70 °F). #takelifeasitcomes

 

We were given a jar with another plant juice – do not recall the details – and we were told to pour on our head and body before going to bed, either in the shower or outside. I went to my room and removed my clothes: I was able to find a spot on the terrace with no one and I poured on myself the warm plant juice. The moon was high up in a beautiful and clear sky, you could see cities and towns really far away. I covered myself with a towel and went to bed.

Day 1 actually passed without even me noticing it. But it was not even the official start yet!

Day  2 | July 24^th

 

I woke up at 7 as I wanted to take my last shower with soap. During the Shamanic Diet – this is the name of this 10day shamanic retreat – you do not need to experience strong smells. I had bought the clay to brush my teeth the day before, as teeth brushing is going to be the most amazing, energizing, fruitful, escaping activities of the following days: I remembered this from my Vipassana retreat.

 

We still had our phones, so I was able to take my transition pic between stop 3 and stop 4 of my sabbatical. Below you can see me wearing a Tell es-Safi t-shirt (stop #3) pointing out the Monte Mariposa (stop #4) on the map behind me.

 

 

Tiago – a Portuguese guy from the retreat – had been so nice to give me a notebook, the one on which I am writing right now: so old fashion, my writing seems awful, have you written recently an hand-letter to someone?

 

Slightly before 8AM we started having breakfast. Our meals are going to be oatmeals and rice, plantains every day: with no salt.

 

 

This food would help plants doing their job. Honestly I didn’t dislike it too much, as I am already used to avoid salt, but can understand the flavourless sensation for the average human attending this retreat. I sent this pic to my family and had the chance to briefly call mom to say: “Talk to you in 10 days”. I texted a dear friend of mine from Madrid with my last wishes, in case something would go wrong and I handed over my phone and other electronic equipment or smelly stuff to the shaman’s team.

 

Geraldine introduced us to the Diet. This meeting lasted a good couple of hours including questions. She explained to us how to get the most for the following 10 days and the importance of introspection, hence the need for disconnection. It’s a path: in order to find the connection we are looking for, we need to insensibly disconnect first, we won't be able to talk to each other, or to strangers who may happened to reach the premises od this retreat place by chance.

We will be in the hermitage of our rooms for all such time and we will be attending the ceremonies at the scheduled times. That’s it. We can write thoughts and take notes, especially on and about our dreams.

 

The shaman gave each of us the plants we are going to take. In my case:

-       Ajo Sacha (primary), to drink daily twice, when handed over to me by Geraldine

-       Bubinzana (secondary), to drink once per day at “lunch” time

Such two plants are supposed to work on decision making, anger, emotions and can solicit vivid dreams. I took my glass of ajo sacha and my full 10day bottle of bubinzana and said Bye to Maryan and Milena, two Bulgarians who were not at their first experience with ayahuasca, and I entered my room. It was about 11am: my isolation had just started.

Plants can make you tired and you may feel sleepier after first intakes for the first couple of days or more. Not sure if it was for the plants or for my intense previous night at the TLV airport, but I decided to take a nap. I dreamt a couple of things including one friend I am not in contact with a lot anymore. I really hope plants won’t have a painful effect on me: the thing I am scared the most is myself, the most “dangerous” thing to me. Quoting Maryan: “or the most precious”; probably it’s better to accept his version, it comes from a veteran indeed.

I decided to retain my watch, which can also be painful, as time will never pass, however I can still decide not to use it. Not sure if I am able to take a pic of this after the Diet is done, but I am marking the floor with a pencil at every hour, according to the sun shade. Probably this can help the time pass faster? Sometimes I keep looking at the watch and it seems stuck. What a beautiful thing the time is, just inflated or deflated by our own perceptions.

According to the shadow, it should be around 4:30pm, more or less. I took my bubinzana at around 1:30pm. I still don’t feel any palpable effect: in some cases plants may not even work with you; I hope I won’t be “that” case.

Looking at the positive, I can write and take notes. In Vipassana retreats I was just alone meditating, with no ways to keep track of my thoughts.

 

I look forward to our dinner, tonight: if I am not wrong it’s going to be plantains; who knows if I am gonna lose some weigh: Israel was intense on that regard, as I ate a lot – but I also pick-axed a lot.

And yes, plantains they were. The shaman just passed with my dinner: hard boiled plantains (no salt, no oil). Honeslty it was not bad, even though I could have probably eaten 3 or 4 of them, instead of 1 plantain, cut into 2 pieces.

I got also a new cup or ajo sacha. Geraldine said it’s normal not to feel anything, as it’s the first day. I am trying not to sleep now as I would like to have a full nght of sleep, even though it may not happen. One of my fear is to get bored; Maryan said sarcastically that with ajo sacha you won’t get bored. Great! Now I am freaking scared!

I believe I “stoled” twice the table that a guy hap prepared for himself for isolation. I did not do it on purpose: I thought the table was there of a first-come first-serve basis. This morning I brought inside my room a little whilte table that I had found in front on my room, on the terrace. And this afternoon, while journaling,  this actually, I found another table (brown, foldable) and I used it twice for 20 mins or so (probably the second time more). I realized this after finishing my writing and going back to my room: from the glass door I saw a guy folding the table and bringing it to his room. We cannot talk to each other at the moment, but I feel so sorry: I came across as douchebag arrogant little piece of shjit. Sorry, dude! Hopefully I remember to say “Sorry” at the end of all of this.